Ordination joy
Some photos from a day I hope I never forget ❤️
Thirteen days ago I was ordained as a transitional deacon in the Episcopal Church. It was a long awaited day for me and my fellow ordinands, made just a touch longer with a month-long postponement due to severe winter weather on our originally scheduled date. I’ve been thinking about how I want to write about the day, and I imagine further thoughts with more theological depth will come to me in time as I continue to reflect and inhabit this vocation, but for the past two weeks when people have asked, the best way I’ve been able to describe what they day was like for me is this: I felt so fully loved.
Loved by God who calls me to this ministry, loved by my family and friends who support me, loved by my husband and children who walk this journey with me up close, loved by my church who raised me up for ordination, loved by my residents and colleagues at work who celebrate my work, loved by my Bishop who encourages and believes in me so much that she laid her hands on me and ordained me as a deacon in God’s church.
I felt positively drenched in love. Saturated to the bone. I considered the rarity of such experiences in our lives; usually it’s limited to events like weddings (which we are there for) and funerals (which we ourselves do not experience). It’s not often people from all aspects of one’s life come together in celebration and joy on our behalf. I have tucked away so many small and great moments from the day so that I can pull them out when I feel discouraged or uncertain. I hope, too, my life and work cultivates that sort of love for other people.
Thanks to those of you who have extended kind and loving words of joy, both friends IRL and on Substack. The joy and community here, as it’s developed since my GOEs in January especially, has been a real treat. It’s also generated fun energy and ideas for my writing practice and my work more broadly. So, thank you. Thank you.
It is in that spirit of gratitude I share these photos and some micro-stories of their significance. ❤️
Two of my long-time girlfriends flew in from out of state to be here for my ordination. We missed Mendy(!!), my best friend from college, who had planned to be here for the original date but couldn’t make the second. Shiloh (left) and I have known each other for 12 years and she’s been my friend through these years of discernment. Iane (right) and I met in Cambridge. She is tia to my children and sister to me. She also became Episcopalian upon returning to the US (what can I say, the Church of England left its mark). They were my chaplains for the weekend, taking on every task I delegated and making sure I had everything I needed, including safety pins for my alb and tissues for my pockets. Iane also was one of my presenters; I chose my rector, a couple from my church, and Iane for this role when a portion of the liturgy is read to present us ordinands to the Bishop on behalf of the church.
The three of us got tattoos together the day before. Mine is a representation of Saint Hildegard’s image for surrendering to God’s movement, “Thus am I: a feather on the breath of God.”
My dear friend Taylor made a stunning Victoria Sponge cake for us to enjoy on Friday night. It was among the best I’ve ever had!
I’ve been to Grace and Holy Trinity Cathedral many times, but I felt extra awed by its beauty when we arrived on Saturday. Sometime last year, I arranged for several of my senior living residents to attend an evensong here. A nonagenarian had a twinkle in her eye as she stepped off the bus. I asked her when she last visited the cathedral. She didn’t answer my question and offered instead, “I got married here.” A number of other residents have their names inscribed on the walls after years of faithful giving and service. It is an honor to share such a significant place with them.
The Right Revered Amy Dafler Meaux, Bishop of the Diocese of West Missouri, has been our Bishop for almost a year. Already I have learned so much from her and feel so honored to be under her leadership and guidance.
“Oh, I think I found myself a cheerleader, she is always right there when I need her” ❤️
A parishioner from my sending congregation got this photo of my husband and daughter in the foreground as I was being ordained in the background. I love it so much!
In addition to choosing presenters, we chose our vesting assistants - the people who would help dress us in our clergy vestments for the first time. My husband and two children assisted me with mine. I hadn’t considered this at the time, but I love that this moment enabled me to hug my family mid-service and feel their warmth and celebration then, rather than waiting until it was over.
Julian was one of the gift bearers during the offertory, joining the children of one of my fellow ordinands.
Many affectionate thanks to my former seminary advisor and now friend for taking this photo of my rector and me serving communion to my family and Iane.
The clergy of the diocese, us now among them ❤️
About three and a half years ago when we started attending St. Paul’s, Steven took me out for coffee and listened for over an hour while I told him my story about being an ecclesial wanderer. He was immediately supportive and has been a faithful friend and guide as I’ve pursued ordination again. I am so thankful for his care and the many ways his belief in me sustained me as I put in the work over these last three years. He also receives all my random questions about Episcopal life and practice and he never rolls his eyes to my face. 😉
It’s no secret I chose to leave the church my husband and I were each raised in. I’ve often said that I bring the best of that tradition with me, and these people — my parents, Jonathan’s parents, and Jonathan’s sister’s family — are a representation of that. They introduced me to Jesus, and their love, faith, and generosity of spirit toward our church shift has been a gift of grace.
Where would we be without girlfriends who have seen us at our worst and still show up to support us at our best?
I could not talk about being drenched in love without my work and church communities who have supported me so fully. Look at their beautiful faces! I feel God’s love most graciously when I am with these people.
After we had been attending our church for about six weeks, we attended our first church social event. At one point in the evening, I heard a group of women gathering for a “church ladies” photo. I assumed it was perhaps for the women who organized the event. I didn’t consider joining. But Pat, dear Pat, grabbed my arm and gently tugged me along. “C’mon! You’re a church lady!” I had felt displaced for so long that I cried all the way home at the wonder of being a church lady again. Pat and her husband Bill, who was on my discernment committee, were two of my presenters.
We concluded the night at the skating rink, naturally.
A perfect night cap to a perfect day.
Thank you for indulging me in this little (large) photo drop. I am filled with hope and love that I know will sustain me for the years of ministry I have ahead of me.
O God of unchangeable power and eternal light: Look
favorably on your whole Church, that wonderful and sacred
mystery; by the effectual working of your providence, carry
out in tranquillity the plan of salvation; let the whole world
see and know that things which were cast down are being
raised up, and things which had grown old are being made
new, and that all things are being brought to their perfection
by him through whom all things were made, your Son Jesus
Christ our Lord; who lives and reigns with you, in the unity
of the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.
The Book of Common Prayer, page 540
Today was another full Friday with my kids’ school assembly, a vet visit for two cats, and a volunteer time slot at my church, but I managed to squeeze in a coffee from Oddly Correct on Troost Ave. They win the favorite mug award!
With gratitude and love,
Janette
Surprise surprise, I’m crying again. Just so proud of you and so incredibly thankful I got to be there. ❤️
I grew up in the Catholic church, so to see all the women being ordained here is a wonder. Warmest congratulations to you; I look forward to reading your stories.