The scene in which Francie gets her vaccine is gutting. There is absolutely nothing that nurtures her - space, process, imagination, relationship, intimacy, or trust. And yet, I'm amazed by her resolve and ability to speak to the doctor the way she did to put him in his place. She has had to do so much nurturing of her spirituality on her own, and while it's really promising to see how her own grit helps her overcome her circumstances, it's hard not to wonder how much further she could go if she was able to be a child for just a little longer than she was.
I also felt a sense of connection with Francie and her first experience of infinity with the lichee nuts. I remember as a child imagining an imagine of a road going down the middle, between two grassy hills, and I couldn't see the end of the road. I remember feeling a little frightened by the idea of infinity, and even not liking the idea of heaven for this reason.
And as far as some of my own experiences as a child, and where I felt most nurtured and where I didn't... I'd have to say that 'space' was something I never lacked, but trust in grownups was an area of struggle. I can remember being reprimanded at a church event for children, when I was about 10, for being too loud. The pastor's wife took me by the arm and shushed me in front of everyone. I felt so much shame, and I can see how that's one encounter that's shaped my own myth of feeling like I am 'too much' when I have a lot to say. Actually, creating Viriditas was a direct action to challenge that thinking in myself.
Re the vaccine scene: Yes, gutting is right! I think what struck me most was the moment where the doctor noted that he had no idea she understood what he said. Definitely a sign of the times, as I believe eugenics was prevalent in the medical community at the time and poverty would have been equated with a "feeble" mind. But still, I think it speaks to adults' (across all time) tendency to forget what it was to be a child and treat them as lemmings (contrary to the fact that most of our adult behavior and coping mechanisms can stem from childhood traumas!)
Re trust and your own experience: I hate that this happened to you. I first remember seeing you at Scottsville church camp when you were probably around that age or a bit older--front row, singing loud, and a friendly boisterous personality. I believe I thought something along the lines of, "Wow, how cool would it be to be that confident?"
I interpreted Francie's ability to speak to the doctor the way she did as a way to protect her little brother. She was hurt by his words and was avoiding the doctor's continuation of that pain to her brother who was just as muddy as she was.
I'm sorry and I feel for your moment of shame when you were about 10. I feel protective of Francie, 'past-Janette', and of my own experiences when I felt shame as we had to swallow that shame for something that probably was underserving of that shame. It was the reprimander's problem, not ours!
It makes me think that I, too, could have had moments of reprimanding that were uncalled for. Being in a public school classroom for 5+ years makes you examine how you speak and educate young learners... especially when it has nothing to do with curriculum, but more to do with behavior and attitude. Thankfully, I had some good examples to follow (and other examples that ended up being an example of what definitely not to do!).
I ended up listening to most of these chapters in the car and therefore did not take notes, but here's a couple of things that stood out to me.
When Francie starts school, and Smith goes into the ways the children would be cruel to each other (ex: the lice lineup), she makes a note that no one learned from this cruelty; if they were spared the next week, they'd join in the name-calling. I wonder which section this would fall under with SPIRIT, maybe intimacy and/or process? If the adults/teachers cared to correct, they could've in this context, but they also scorned the children and played favorites. It seems the children were constantly subconsciously vying for the attention of adults that would keep them safe, and maybe that's what kept them in this competitive atmosphere.
From Francie's viewpoint, how can Aunt Sissy be bad, when she is able to meet her needs in a specific way in which her parents are able? I cheered for Sissy when she threatens that teacher as she advocates for Francie.
There's definitely a sense of absence from the teachers, isn't there? In some of the sources I'm reading in regards to parenting my own two children, there's importance placed in setting boundaries for children - with empathy - so they they trust you as a person who can set and hold boundaries not only when it's hard for them, but when they need them for their own protection at some point, too. That sort of trusting relationship is absent from Francie's life.
It does seem like Aunt Sissy fills a void in Francie's life! I feel heartbroken about Katie because she's clearly giving everything she can for the sake of her kids and even then she sadly doesn't have enough to give. I'm glad Sissy is there to help around the margins of Katie's capacity.
Francie’s whole entrance into school was just heartbreaking. Between the doctor and nurse and the teacher, it’s tough to see how few people are actually on her side. I was struck by the bathroom reality, and how Francie was with Sissy and Francie trusted her enough to tell her she had wet herself. Even there, Francie was terrified of telling her mom because she knew her mom would be mad about it. This was the aunt that wasn’t even supposed to be there, but not only was she there physically, she was there emotionally. It made me cheer to see even one person who was truly on Francie’s side and I wonder if that moment gave Francie the courage to keep going back into the trenches.
The scene in which Francie gets her vaccine is gutting. There is absolutely nothing that nurtures her - space, process, imagination, relationship, intimacy, or trust. And yet, I'm amazed by her resolve and ability to speak to the doctor the way she did to put him in his place. She has had to do so much nurturing of her spirituality on her own, and while it's really promising to see how her own grit helps her overcome her circumstances, it's hard not to wonder how much further she could go if she was able to be a child for just a little longer than she was.
I also felt a sense of connection with Francie and her first experience of infinity with the lichee nuts. I remember as a child imagining an imagine of a road going down the middle, between two grassy hills, and I couldn't see the end of the road. I remember feeling a little frightened by the idea of infinity, and even not liking the idea of heaven for this reason.
And as far as some of my own experiences as a child, and where I felt most nurtured and where I didn't... I'd have to say that 'space' was something I never lacked, but trust in grownups was an area of struggle. I can remember being reprimanded at a church event for children, when I was about 10, for being too loud. The pastor's wife took me by the arm and shushed me in front of everyone. I felt so much shame, and I can see how that's one encounter that's shaped my own myth of feeling like I am 'too much' when I have a lot to say. Actually, creating Viriditas was a direct action to challenge that thinking in myself.
Re the vaccine scene: Yes, gutting is right! I think what struck me most was the moment where the doctor noted that he had no idea she understood what he said. Definitely a sign of the times, as I believe eugenics was prevalent in the medical community at the time and poverty would have been equated with a "feeble" mind. But still, I think it speaks to adults' (across all time) tendency to forget what it was to be a child and treat them as lemmings (contrary to the fact that most of our adult behavior and coping mechanisms can stem from childhood traumas!)
Re trust and your own experience: I hate that this happened to you. I first remember seeing you at Scottsville church camp when you were probably around that age or a bit older--front row, singing loud, and a friendly boisterous personality. I believe I thought something along the lines of, "Wow, how cool would it be to be that confident?"
I interpreted Francie's ability to speak to the doctor the way she did as a way to protect her little brother. She was hurt by his words and was avoiding the doctor's continuation of that pain to her brother who was just as muddy as she was.
I'm sorry and I feel for your moment of shame when you were about 10. I feel protective of Francie, 'past-Janette', and of my own experiences when I felt shame as we had to swallow that shame for something that probably was underserving of that shame. It was the reprimander's problem, not ours!
It makes me think that I, too, could have had moments of reprimanding that were uncalled for. Being in a public school classroom for 5+ years makes you examine how you speak and educate young learners... especially when it has nothing to do with curriculum, but more to do with behavior and attitude. Thankfully, I had some good examples to follow (and other examples that ended up being an example of what definitely not to do!).
I ended up listening to most of these chapters in the car and therefore did not take notes, but here's a couple of things that stood out to me.
When Francie starts school, and Smith goes into the ways the children would be cruel to each other (ex: the lice lineup), she makes a note that no one learned from this cruelty; if they were spared the next week, they'd join in the name-calling. I wonder which section this would fall under with SPIRIT, maybe intimacy and/or process? If the adults/teachers cared to correct, they could've in this context, but they also scorned the children and played favorites. It seems the children were constantly subconsciously vying for the attention of adults that would keep them safe, and maybe that's what kept them in this competitive atmosphere.
From Francie's viewpoint, how can Aunt Sissy be bad, when she is able to meet her needs in a specific way in which her parents are able? I cheered for Sissy when she threatens that teacher as she advocates for Francie.
There's definitely a sense of absence from the teachers, isn't there? In some of the sources I'm reading in regards to parenting my own two children, there's importance placed in setting boundaries for children - with empathy - so they they trust you as a person who can set and hold boundaries not only when it's hard for them, but when they need them for their own protection at some point, too. That sort of trusting relationship is absent from Francie's life.
It does seem like Aunt Sissy fills a void in Francie's life! I feel heartbroken about Katie because she's clearly giving everything she can for the sake of her kids and even then she sadly doesn't have enough to give. I'm glad Sissy is there to help around the margins of Katie's capacity.
Francie’s whole entrance into school was just heartbreaking. Between the doctor and nurse and the teacher, it’s tough to see how few people are actually on her side. I was struck by the bathroom reality, and how Francie was with Sissy and Francie trusted her enough to tell her she had wet herself. Even there, Francie was terrified of telling her mom because she knew her mom would be mad about it. This was the aunt that wasn’t even supposed to be there, but not only was she there physically, she was there emotionally. It made me cheer to see even one person who was truly on Francie’s side and I wonder if that moment gave Francie the courage to keep going back into the trenches.